You won't lead me where you don't go...

I have a lump in my throat this morning.  I am moments away from the ugly cry.

So far, DC has been a pretty solitary experience for me.  Although I tend to be a little bit hermity, I also need people.  I need hugs.  I need laughter.  I like community.

I don't have any of these things.  Yet.  And, since this is such a short season, I may not ever find these things here.  But, I'm praying that God will surprise me, and blow my socks off with blessings.

I came into the office this morning, and there is only one other person here.  Her name is Tiffany, and she is great.  She's the head attorney working on Pastor Saeed's case.  She is 32.  She loves Jesus.  And this morning, as I sat in her office, God used her to speak directly to me.  We don't know each other.  Really. We've had one lunch together, and a handful of short, work related conversations.

Somehow, she ended up playing a song for me.  It's called "We Dance."  And we sat in her office and cried. Both knowing that we are in similar seasons in our faith journey.

Trusting God.
Separating the truth from the lies
Knowing who we are in Him, and not in the world
Trading our mourning for joy

And right now, all I want to do is curl up under a big blanket and cry my eyes out.  I want to take time and pour out my every thought to the Lord.  But, that will have to wait.  There is work to be done, so I'm asking God to dry up my tears for the time being, to allow me to focus on the life fight for Pastor Saeed.

I'm also asking God to be bold but gentle with me right now.  That He will spin me round and round and round.

dichotomy...

Night 3 in DC.  Also, my first night alone here.

The last two days were spent with a coworker, now turned friend, from Boone.  She met me on Sunday night to show me the ropes, and to introduce me to my contact at the ACLJ (American Center for Law and Justice).  We laughed and ate our way through DC over the last few days.  It was really nice.  She left this morning.

Today, I spent my first day in my new office.  Funny enough, it's right across the street from the Supreme Court, and looks directly into Colin Powell's office.  With my history of ridiculousness, I'm pretty sure 'ol Colin and I will be having lunch in no time!  Until then, anyone have any binoculars I can borrow?!

I've been doing a lot of thinking about Pastor Saeed over the past few days.  He's in an Iranian prison for simply being a believer.  He is part of the persecuted church.  He is being beaten for his faith.

I was undeniably called to the mission field nearly 15 years ago.  It was a Sunday morning, and it was the National Day of Prayer for the Persecuted Church.  It was the clearest I have ever heard the Lord speak to me.  Since that time, I have been serving the marginalized.  Serving those that simply need some outside help.  And today, as I sat in my new swanky office, in my pretty new heels that gave me terrible blisters, I realized that my life and calling has come full circle.  Somehow, God has plunked me smack in the middle of one of the biggest examples of the persecuted church in recent history.  I get to help plan an event that we hope will shed light not only on his situation and persecution, but on this plight around the world.

And ultimately, we pray for his release.  Until then, my heart is burdened with thoughts of him, and his family.  His wife and babies, who he hasn't seen in two years.  I pray in this moment that he will feel the Lord's presence.  I pray that the members of ISIS that are in the prison will have no opportunity to harm him.  I pray that where his body is wounded, that there would be healing.  

I'll be living across from the Pentagon for the next 42 days.  I can see it from my hotel window.  What a dichotomy.  Seeing this symbol of freedom, while in the midst of a fight for someone that has no freedom.  If you're reading this, you most likely live in "the land of the free, and the home of the brave".  I want to invite you to join this fight.  To exercise your freedom to help another, and others, that you will most likely never meet.  Please take a minute to visit:  http://beheardproject.com/prayer-vigil/saeed

I'll be in DC for the kickoff on September 25th, and would love to see you and your churches become part of these grassroots vigils on September 26th.

Until now, Saeed has just been a story that I've heard.  Now, I'm overwhelmed with the details of his imprisonment, and what his family has been through during this separation.

Would you right now, take a minute to pray?  To boldly pray for his release?  Oh, what a day that will be!  I'll bring the cake!  

Ms. Lowrey goes to Washington...

God keeps surprising me.  Every.  Single.  Day.  

I was approached late last week about an opportunity to work on a special project for Samaritan's Purse.  It came completely out of left field.  As soon as it was explained and offered, I knew that I was supposed to accept it.

I've been looking forward to a season of rest.  My last day with OCC is this coming Friday.  I just found out yesterday that I will leave for DC on Sunday.  Instead of a season of rest, I now have 1 day.  

So, that's different.  

My friend asked me if I'm ok with it.  As it is so different than what I've been anticipating.  My immediate answer was "God knows that my sense of adventure is greater than my desire for rest."  

And beyond that, I trust God.  He keeps telling me to simply wake up each day, and He will reveal the next steps.  

I'm not able to supply a lot of details right now, but I'll be moving to Washington DC for a month and a half to work with Samaritan's Purse and the ACLJ (American Center for Law and Justice) to help coordinate an event for Pastor Saeed Abedin. (American/Iranian Pastor that is currently imprisoned in Iran.)  

Will you please pray for Pastor Saeed?  Just today, the ACLJ posted this story:  http://aclj.org/iran/isis-militants-issue-death-threats-against-pastor-saeed-from-within-rajai-shahr-prison

I feel like there is A LOT going on in my life right now.  I'm unable to process everything that is happening. 

And that's ok.  

I'm just taking one minute at a time.  Trusting God with the big and small details of my life.

She's my daughter too...

I was talking to my Dad the other night, and he shared with me that these last few months he has been worried about my future.  My parents are very solid and financially responsible people.  They have been perfect examples of financial stewardship.  

My Dad found himself being anxious that I won't have health insurance.  Worried about me not having an income.  Worried that the contract on my house fell through.  Just worried, because he loves me, and wants me to be OK.

He said about a month ago he was praying...telling God what was on his heart about me.  And he heard God say the following..."She's my daughter too.  Don't worry, I will take care of her."  

Oh gah.  I love that SO much.  My dad said after that, he felt peace. 

I am so grateful to have an earthly and Heavenly Father that love and care for me.

I also love that my Mom ended our conversation by praying for me, and the desires of my heart.

Thanks to my Mom and Dad for always being part of my crazy, adventurous life.  I know it doesn't always make sense, but you raised me to trust the Lord, and I do.  Love you.  

Launched...

In church this morning, my friend (and Pastor), Jason, shared a story that left me wondering why I ever wear makeup to church.  I should just stop.  I cry it off...every. single. time.

He shared about when he knew God was calling him to be the Pastor of a little mountain church in Boone. Jason, didn't want that.  But God pursued him, and confirmed that calling. (And we all thank God that Jason listened!)

Jason shared that He felt like God was throwing him up in the air.  Like a Father would do with a child.  And as gravity has a tendency to take over, the child will always fall.  To be caught.  And typically thrown up again.  There's always an up and down. But Jason shared that during this time, he never felt like he came back down...but that God came up to him.  Ultimately to throw him higher and higher each time.

This spoke to me in ways that I can't even begin to share with you.  But, this is how I've been feeling lately.  Knowing, undoubtedly, that God has been throwing me in the air.  And how fun and delightful that has been.  But, I've been feeling the fall that inevitably comes with it.  And each time, the Lord catches me.  And when it's time to launch me again, I feel myself having to take that deep breath of preparedness that comes with being launched.

This morning, through Jason, the Lord put a new prayer on my heart.  That God will continue to toss me, but that He will raise up to meet me, instead of having to catch me when I fall.

I could use a little bit of momentum in my life right now.  Everything is different.  Not much is familiar.  The future is completely unknown.  I'm embracing every little thing that is coming my way, but its hard.  And at times, a little bit isolating.

I am grateful for these words this morning, and my new prayer.

Free Falling...

5 years ago today in Fiji I jumped out of a plane at 12,000 feet. Choosing to fall head first out of the plane was terrifying, but then the free fall was pure bliss. 

Think there is a life lesson there...